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Wakenight & Associates, P.C.

707 N. York Street, Suite 201, Elmhurst, IL 60126

DuPage County | 630-852-9700

Mokena | 815-727-6144   Oak Park | 708-848-3159

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When you filed for divorce , you probably did all the“right”and “expected” things: you hired an excellent lawyer, read suggested books or articles, and logically prepared for your post-divorce life. But when it comes to divorce , you can do all the“right things”and still spiral emotionally. After all, your life is changing forever. this is a stressful and emotionally taxing experience even when the legal process is going smoothly.

the only way to move forward is to shake up your life in a positive way.Your depression may be difficult to escape because your divorce is naturally affecting so many aspects of your life. To help you discover new and constructive experiences, the Illinois divorce attorney s at Wakenight & Associates, P.C. have created this list of tips to help you deal with divorce depression.

Tip #1: (Re)discover a New Hobby

It can be difficult to find time for yourself when you're going through a divorce , working, and raising children . But this could be the perfecttime to rediscover a beloved hobby that's been put aside for way too long. Alternatively, you can also discover a new hobby by looking online or experimenting with classes. Maybe you can even learn a new language r instrument you've always been interested in. By staying busy and exploring yourself, you can rediscover confidence and maybe develop some new personal connections.

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Each November, countless families across the country come together to celebrate their blessings and eat a hearty Thanksgiving feast. But, like most holidays, Thanksgiving can be an extremely difficult and emotional experience for the recently divorce d. For the first time in a long time, you may be alone on a day that glorifies the ideals of “family” and “togetherness.”It's completely natural to feel a little glum.

To help you find a little comfort this holiday season, the Illinois divorce attorney s at Wakenight & Associates, P.C. have completed this Thanksgiving survival guide.

Take Action & Avoid Depression

It's hard to feel excited about a home cooked meal when your ex-spouse and children won't be at the table. For people readjusting to single life, it can be difficult to get out of bed in the morning, let alone enjoy a family-based holiday. Even so, you can still embrace the spirit of the day and summon the energy to create new Thanksgiving traditions.

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One of the first and most important steps in the divorce process is deciding which spouse is going to keep the family home. this helps a divorcing couple decide who is responsible for paying the mortgage during and after the divorce . However, if the home was purchased using a VA loan, this process can get a little more complicated.

VA Home Loans

A veteran may be eligible for a loan if they served their required term or were honorably discharged. this loan can be used to purchase a home and help a burgeoning family start the next chapter of their lives. The veteran's spouse can share and enjoy their partner's benefits for the duration of their marriage. However, once the divorce is finalized, these benefits are stripped away entirely.

Veterans can only receive one VA loan at a time, so they rarely want to leave the family home to their ex-spouse. It's important that whichever spouse receives the family home is able to afford it. If a single owner can't pay thefull mortgage on their own, they may need to refinance the house to secure a longer mortgage or lower the interest rate to make the monthly payments more affordable. Usually, this option is only applicable if the veteran keeps the home or is willing to let their spouse have it for the sake of their children .

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Establishing a child custody arrangement is one of the most challenging aspects of the divorce process. Unfortunately, it's difficult for many ex-spouses to treat each other cordially once the divorce has been finalized. In fact, sometimes a resentful ex-spouse can behave in a way that unintentionally influences how a child perceives their other parent. In worst-case scenarios, an ex may intentionally drive a wedge that separates a child physically and emotionally from their other parent.

Parental alienation is a serious concern for many divorce d parents. The only way to manage the situation is to recognize the signs of parental alienation and, if necessary, seek legal assistance.

What Is Parental Alienation?

Parental alienation occurs when one parent manipulates a child into disengaging emotionally from their other parent. By exploiting a child's guilt and confusion, a parent can trick their child into attaching negative associations to their other parent. However, this creates a difficult psychological dilemma that can permanently traumatize a child.

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Once the summer months fade into fall, children across the country start dreaming of the one night a year they can throw on their favorite costumes to knock on doors for yummy treats and playful frights. However, any holiday event can be difficult for families once a divorce has been finalized, and Halloween is no exception. It's not unusual for children to lack the Halloween spirit because they are still processing their new reality. As a responsible co-parent, it's your responsibility to put aside your own complicated feelings to ensure that your child has the best Halloween ever.

We understand that this may be an emotional event for you as a parent.To help you get through this night, the Illinois divorce attorney s atWakenight & Associates, P.C. have assembled the following helpful tips:

Tip #1: Don't Put Pressure on Your Child

Some parents make the mistake of asking their child who they would prefer to spend a holiday with . this puts an intense amount of pressure on a child that is still reconciling with a divorce and may be afraid to hurt one parent's feelings. How can they have fun running around the neighborhood if they're feeling guilty?

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